How To Discuss Marriage Problems With Counselor ?

Counsellor is a person who is expert in his field. A counsellor is a psychoanalyst, with his academic study and practice over a period of time, has attained a level of perfection in providing advice to his clients on the matters he/she is consulted. Marriage counsellors play an important role to sort out differences between couples. In this period of fast life when everyone is trying to excel the other, and there is a desire to achieve great height in professional life, differences creep up in married life.

Endeavour should be to sort out the differences by mutual openhearted discussion but if it is not possible to resolve the differences, marriage counsellor should be consulted. Selection of counsellor is of utmost importance. The best results will be achieved if both the partners go to him and have open discussion. However, if it is not possible, the one going to him should be careful of disclosing the details. Though necessary information should be provided but careful selection is necessary as the information provided may be taped or noted and used in court in case dispute is not resolved and the partners decide to separate.

The following should be kept in mind during discussion with the counsellor.

Though revealing the basic facts, the disclosure should not be made in such a way that it leads to embarrassment of the other party. A disclosure such as not having physical intimacy for a long time should not be associated with the weakness of the other and extramarital affair should not be suspected without adequate proof.

Be honest but don’t exaggerate other persons shortcomings. Never shirk disclosing one’s own weakness like short temper, suspicious nature, jealousy due to professional progress of the marriage partner, or problem of bringing up the children.

There can be a number of problems in marriage. These often tend to multiply when there are differences. The main problem should be highlighted first. If a solution can be found to the main cause of discontent, it will be easy to sort out other minor issues. Always be ready to be receptive to the advice and try to implement it in married life. This way results will be apparent.

Remember that you are going to a counsellor to come out of the difficult time and not to vent your grudges. Be calm, clear in approach and receptive for best results, otherwise you will end up wasting time and money.